Kids love to argue.  I remember getting into exchanges when I was in elementary school:  “You’re a doofus!”  “No, YOU’RE a doofus!”  “You’re a doofus times a hundred!”  “You’re a doofus times a thousand!”  “You’re a doofus times a hundred million thousand!”  “You’re a doofus times a million kajillion!”  “That’s not even English, stupid!  Which means YOU’RE a doofus times a googolplex and that’s that.”

…Can you tell which one is me?

Anyways, a couple of my campers this summer got into an argument about who was the “champion of the world” and it escalated pretty quickly.  One particularly delicate student, let’s call him Queeno, got upset that the other student was claiming to be the best when Queeno felt that he himself should be the best.  It escalated into shouting pretty quickly, as these things normally do, but then I had a brilliant idea.  Solve it in the battlebot arena, boys.


Queeno decided to record his voice on his robot saying “this is Queeno, the most powerful person in the world”.  The other boy added a chainsaw to his, which isn’t actually that useful when it comes to pushing the other bot out of the arena, but it looks cool.  Ultimately, Queeno lost and cried, but at least it was a decisive loss and not some arbitrary argument.

Ultimately, I decided that battlebots can be super useful for deciding in-class arguments, although I’m not sure how well that lesson translates to the real world.  Good thing I’m not a real teacher?